the bathroom gut
eight rooms & seven months left
Day One: Started great. I went to the store and Starbucks by the time I got home Ben had the toilet and sink sitting beside the dumpster. But as in all matters of home improvement. Things went to hell quickly after that. Ten hours later we had had a minor flood, a small fire, a tortured elbow, a conk on the head, a burn due to scalding, a chip of tile in the eye, bleeding from multiple cuts and exposure to heaven knows what germs and carcinogens.
This bathroom, built in 1949, was made to survive an atomic bomb. The people may all have been dead, the this bathroom, by God, would still be standing. Cement, chicken wire, whatever they used for tile adhesion and for some reason nails. When Ben, on his fourth trip to home depot, asked if I could think of anything else we need, my only thought besides dynamite was a gun, with two bullets.
Why wasn’t the upstairs by this hard I was thinking. But then I remembered, no tile! It was, wait for it, varnished plywood! By the end of the day I was wearing my earbuds, a beanie, safety glasses and because we were down to only had one pair of gloves…MITTENS. It was quite the sight. Sorry, no pictures please.
Day two: This morning I feel like I’ve been shot out of a cannon, in yesterdays outfit, on youtube. Around 7pm yesterday, I got the idea to call our buddy Brinkman to see if he had a “mini jackhammer.” He does, it’s official name is air chisel. We are going to get that and see if it goes better. Heaven help us, we have to have the sub floor in today for guy to pour the pan tomorrow.
I need a valium, cigarette and a drink. And probably a shrink. I must admit that I did have an epiphany. The only down side to brute force is that it creates a horrible mess to clean up. And I’m the one with the broom.
Day three: Too tired to write. A friend asked if Ben and I were still speaking to each other. I said no, that we were too tired to talk, so communicating for us now is pointing and grunting. But we are making progress. Slowly. I can live with the fact that I have four projects on my desk, waiting, and that I don’t have a shower. But I am having a really hard time with the mess. And the DUST that is everywhere including my lungs. Dan Lindell of Lindell Tile is here pouring the pan. It’s beautiful and he is awesome and helped Ben today. They got a lot done. Artisans are under rated!
Day Four: I’m working and running today. I need a break. Brinkman came to help Ben and he was worth every dollar we paid him. It was a bit of a harsh on my mellow when I realized that he was making more money an hour then I was. But, I was in regular clothes at my computer working and not putting in a vent and light in the shower. Which works and looks great by the way.
Day Five: Today we hung sheet rock. It looks good and wasn’t too bad of a day. So we have the floors ready for tile and the sheet rock ready for mud. The only monkey in the wrench is that no one at The Tile Shop told us we needed to PRE order the tile. Seriously, we should have known, but still it would have been nice had they mentioned it. So most of the day was spent running around, getting stuff we need and picking up tile at 2 different locations. Trips to home desperate for the week are nearing 15. They called this morning to see if Ben was coming in. We are actually bleeding money right now. Oh, the budget.
Day Six: This has been the worst day. I shit you not. I actually thought that Ben was going to blow an aneurysm and I’d be telling the guys from his fire station what happened. In a nut shell…broken tools, plumbing issues, computer meeting issues (I fixed that one, but all I could think about was getting drunk and breaking the laptop with the new sledge hammer) and sense that things would get worse…and they did – I sent him to WI to go Charlie’s cabin and on the way he hit a deer. Really. He’s fine, the deer and the car are not. Add, no email – work deadlines, sheetrock, Christmas shopping and the mess! Even Stella isn’t talking to me any more. Well, not talking…that would be crazy. But Clay came to help and he did! All that muscle and fresh energy. Youth!
Day Seven: Nothing. I work, run, shop, work, clean, work. And shower at Tom and Al’s, God bless them. Maybe I’ll layout some floor tile to see where we want to start in the morning.