it’s going to take some time.

Remember that time when I started a blog about doing 10 rooms in 10 months? (the budget? hah! – it gone). Well, it’s been a year. I can’t believe it but it’s true and I’m still on rooms 5, 6 and 7. How DID this happen?

We may have to move
With the fall, in my crooked, half done house, come mice. Disease carrying, nose twitching, procreating, poop dropping mother-fucking mice. And I can’t stand it. I feel like the warden of a Texas prison. Except with little guillotines instead of electric chairs. Every morning its look at the death toll and the removal of bodies. Don’t get me wrong, like many Americans, I know they deserve to die, I just don’t want to be the one whose killing them. We have searched, blocked holes and used steel wool all to no avail. We can not find how they are getting in or who is their ring leader, the big cheese at it were. I really don’t want to call an exterminator, I know that a lot of them just use poison and the phrase “it will only smell like decomposing rodent for a few days.” Ugh, my stomach is upset. One little convict escaped last nights trap. I thought “You called down the thunder. Well, now you’ve got it! I see a furry ass, I’m killing the mouse that’s waggin it! So run, you turd… RUN! Tell all the other turds the Warden’s coming! You tell ’em I’m coming… and Hell’s coming with me, you hear?! Hell’s coming with me!” And the last meal on the row is always the same. Peanut butter.

This is why I’m not done
Somewhere in the last 3 months my career became a job. A City report, a City newsletter, a non-profit newsletter, a County newsletter and two websites. That’s a lot for me. But every Saturday and Sunday for the last 3 weeks have been spent stenciling. Now don’t get me wrong – this was a great idea. And I really like how it’s turning out – the words labor intensive are not strong enough. Think drawing wallpaper with a level and painters tape. The stencil (Etsy, again) is awesome. But the death is in the details. The paint: too heavy, too light, oops missed a spot and the corners…just kill me. I’m only showing little pictures because it’s not done…yet. But you get the idea. You level the stencil, dab dab dab and move it, level the stencil, dab dab dab dab dab and move it. Like, maybe nine hundred times. You can see the contrast on the 2 walls that are gray as opposed to the “oyster.” I like it. But be warned, if you want perfect – get wallpaper.This is not for the OCD. I’m going to be spending hours “touching” up the splotches and blots. I’m not a big fan of perfect (really, it’s true you have to believe me) but I made a few mistakes that have to be fixed, okay a lot of mistakes. Sigh.

My friend and neighbor Al (who I love) is a seeker of odd and sometimes amazing artifacts. This is a huge plus when it’s sublime (he shares) and not so much when it’s ridiculous. Case in point – these wonderful root balls from somewhere in Tibet or something (I wasn’t listening) that he turned into lanterns for his Labor Day party. I have convinced him to sell me one so that I can use it as the light going upstairs (next to the big white wall). He’s going to let me have ONE (there are several) and I’m excited. I didn’t like the IKEA light that much and I’m tired of the painting. So, when the light goes up (soon) I’m going use the shadow it recreates as the base for the “new” painting. (What is wrong with me? Seriously) The down side of Al’s adventures in scavenging is the ridiculous. For example, when he’s driving through Left Overshoe Oklahoma and sees a sign for some yokel who has 20,000 bowling balls in his yard that he’s made into “art.” THEN texts you the photos at midnight on a weekday. Not once, but 3 times. So for each text; One: not art. two: don’t care and three: hello! sleeping!

The television is safe
Behold the mantel. Reclaimed wood, with knots and worm patterns. Lovely. Easy to put up and, of course, made to order at Etsy for $60 including delivery. I ain’t lying. Now I can’t figure out what to put on top of it. Don’t like the big candles. Tealights? A little trough planter with grass (no, not that kind – it’s not the 60’s) I’ve no idea. I saw some cool little bird sculptures, but Lenia would have issues. She hates birds. It’s a long story. Maybe I should just leave it empty – what am I saying…an empty shelf? That’s just crazy talk! So I will continue to look, ideas welcome – please send photos.

Ben thinks we should sand the flours ourselves
Really? I think, are you good in the head? But then I realized that it could make excellent blogging material.We haven’t had a disaster in a while, and after finishing paying for the wedding (yikes! next week) we could stand to save a little money. But this will be tricky and the potential for a major argument is guaranteed because neither one of us would know what we were doing. That’s bad, real bad. But what’s the worst that could happen…
it’s a rhetorical question…don’t send photos…

Yes, actual mice were injured in the writing of this blog.